These brothers are the gunfire Mario Bros. as if they were imagined to be real. Instead of Koopas and Goombas it’s bull-dogs (foaming at the mouth and with massive haunches) and do-do brained mafia men. The classic stomp enemies on the head until their brain is leaking from their nose and ears remains, but The [...]
Alright, I admit that I only play this game to listen to the theme in an infinite loop. The fact that I am playing this game, which is an endless runner, is to cover up my adoration for the song. If someone on transit were to asks me, as if shaming me, why are you [...]
Outer space is such a lonely place. Cruising through this great void, passing asteroids and temperamental gas giants, I miss my wife, I miss the human race. And I think it’s going to be a long-long time until I find the muse again. I’d like to imagine that this is a spaceship containing the [...]
These were the days when the human race hunted and gathered, so had healthier teeth than today’s pretentious post-modern society. While we have our iPhones, humor, trite pulp culture references, and cultural wildfires such as the Harlam Shake, the protocivilizations of yesterday had perfect teeth. I’d suggest that maybe we should all grab a bundle [...]
I don’t know what is up with the mobile video game market’s obsession with pixel style games. It could be that developers who lack the big budget to produce visually fancy games (Infinity Blade or Ravensword 2) utilize the retro look because it isn’t as resource intensive. Maybe it’s a trend…a fad that’ll (I slightly [...]
This is how I imagine the future of our dear moon. Flying through space. Cold and alone, yet in the company of good-spirited planets as well as hostile ones. And an unknown fate. Though, I do not imagine the moon infected with common cold. Eyes swollen. Snot dangling from its nose. And propelling itself through [...]
Being a despiser of cats, Hackycat by Ken Wong is the perfect game for me because I can kick cats without repercussions. I blame my vile disposition towards cats on Reddit’s constant whoring of the animals as being cute, cuddly and gentle (we all know cats are evil, right?) because I refuse to conform to [...]
Finally, a building simulator that pushes the mobile genre of games an evolutionary step forward. Pixel People, by Lambda Mu (and published by Chillingo), abandons the degenerating game play mechanics of cleaning the city or producing candy bars in factories and having to wait a twenty-four hour period for the results. Pixel People even includes pixelated sprites that [...]
Released a few weeks ago, Time Surfer by Kumobius hasn’t attracted the attention it deserves. This saddens me. When I open up Time Surfer, I’m transported to the end of the universe which feels like its been inspired by a long running Japanese Anime series (I’d wager Naruto or One Piece lengths). Time Surfer is [...]
And here I was convinced that PSY had retired Gangnam Style when the mobile game Gangnam Style City is released on the app store by Voon. Another entry in the mall-crowded endless runner genre of games. Dance across roof tops, in what I presume is an 8-bit rendered Korean metropolis as PSY himself, collecting all [...]